[Doesn't exist. And there's silence from Hajime, for several minutes as he just stares straight ahead. Dread chokes his throat like bile, and he can't say anything. Can't think past this idea that whoever the Future Foundation put into the program, whoever Kamukura Izuru is... that isn't him.
He briefly turns over the idea that he started using an alias, but can't logic (dive) a reason as to why. None of the others had. So why wouldn't the Future Foundation have had record of him?
It's a long time before he numbly manages to text one question.]
[There were a few things that made him feel confident. Though one of them had more to do with the strange concept that Hinata was somehow a digital avatar in the flesh, which he really didn't quite understand and wanted to think about as little as possible. The other was... well, it was more a feeling than anything but Hinata wouldn't accept that as a real reason.]
[That's said aloud, to himself, as he stares at the opposite wall instead of responding back immediately. To be capable of things... like someone talented? Or to be capable of being the center of... all the absurdity, all of the strangeness and despair that they'd all been a part of?
He isn't sure if he wants to know the answer to that.]
is it possible the file you found on hinata hajime was fake
or the file on kamukura izuru
i don't understand how it's possible that the future foundation wouldn't have a record of shoving me into their program. there was no kamukura izuru on the island with us. i've always been hinata hajime. my entire life.
[And that hurts all over again. Something he hasn't even experienced for himself, but knowing that Chiaki isn't real... it's what had led to his entire conversation with Dirk in the first place. A need to let her be her own person, outside of the program.
But can he do something like that, really? When he doesn't even know who he is?]
so what am i?
[It's hard to say if he's expecting an answer from Nagito or not.]
You're Hinata Hajime. That's the only thing important. Kamukura Izuru doesn't matter. The same as the person who cut off their hand doesn't matter.
[Which was still a thing that bothered him. He didn't understand who that person was, and to think Hinata had a more complicated question to deal with....]
[He just can't be sure. But he feels like he's gotten all the answers out of Nagito that he possibly can at the moment. What he needs is more evidence, and that means talking to the other person who's further along the bullshit timeline than he is.
A couple minutes later, he texts Nagito again.]
i can't get a hold of sonia. did she say anything to you about going on a mission?
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He briefly turns over the idea that he started using an alias, but can't logic (dive) a reason as to why. None of the others had. So why wouldn't the Future Foundation have had record of him?
It's a long time before he numbly manages to text one question.]
how can you know?
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You don't look like them.
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is that the only reason
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[That's said aloud, to himself, as he stares at the opposite wall instead of responding back immediately. To be capable of things... like someone talented? Or to be capable of being the center of... all the absurdity, all of the strangeness and despair that they'd all been a part of?
He isn't sure if he wants to know the answer to that.]
is it possible the file you found on hinata hajime was fake
or the file on kamukura izuru
i don't understand how it's possible that the future foundation wouldn't have a record of shoving me into their program. there was no kamukura izuru on the island with us. i've always been hinata hajime. my entire life.
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But....
You're not the traitor.
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[And that hurts all over again. Something he hasn't even experienced for himself, but knowing that Chiaki isn't real... it's what had led to his entire conversation with Dirk in the first place. A need to let her be her own person, outside of the program.
But can he do something like that, really? When he doesn't even know who he is?]
so what am i?
[It's hard to say if he's expecting an answer from Nagito or not.]
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[Which was still a thing that bothered him. He didn't understand who that person was, and to think Hinata had a more complicated question to deal with....]
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[He just can't be sure. But he feels like he's gotten all the answers out of Nagito that he possibly can at the moment. What he needs is more evidence, and that means talking to the other person who's further along the bullshit timeline than he is.
A couple minutes later, he texts Nagito again.]
i can't get a hold of sonia. did she say anything to you about going on a mission?
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[That was a bit worrying to hear though. Was everything going wrong?]
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it's possible she just went out on her own out of range
[Possible, but... he can't help but remember Faize and Lymle, two of his friends who just... vanished. Along with so many others.]
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[He doesn't say it, but he's scared. A good way to distract him from issues of Himself? His classmates potentially being in danger.]
she can't detect any sign of her yet.
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[He can tell this is a distraction, and this was fine.]
If she left we would then at least know that much and maybe an idea of where she went.
Is there a reason to be concerned though? Sonia san is rather capable.
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she is capable, but this planet...
people can just disappear and never be seen again. i've had too many friends do that already, i can't lose any of you guys.
[Even Nagito.]
i'm not going to immediately panic and go search for her. but i am going to keep trying to hail her.
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We shouldn't worry for now, if she's not at dinner or breakfast without word that will be a worrying sign.
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i'm probably overreacting.
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